Tag: writer

ZANZIBAR CIRCUS 10.23.18

A pre-Halloween glimpse into the twisted mind of Mr. Kieran. #BonVoyage  

Jonny’s Retro-Cinema Hall of LAME: Goo-Luvin’ Giants … with their own village!

JONNY’S RETRO-CINEMA HALL OF LAME presents TODAY’S DUBIOUS HONOREE: VILLAGE OF THE GIANTS (1965) GUILTY OF VEHICULAR FANSLAUGHTER: Director Bert Gordon with “Stars” Beau Bridges, Tommy Kirk, Joy Harmon, Johnny Crawford, Ron Howard, Robert Random, Toni Basil, Vicki London, and other Assorted Aces of Awfulness RUDIMENTARY ANALYSIS: Based more loosely than a herd of rabid, wailing cows attempting to dance the Virginia Reel upon H.G. … Read More Jonny’s Retro-Cinema Hall of LAME: Goo-Luvin’ Giants … with their own village!

POP HAZMAT HEADLINE DU JOUR: Rat-Meat Ring Busted in China! posted by JONATHAN KIERAN

A sweeping modern fairy-tale is born. Book One is the timeless magical cornerstone – a lavishly illustrated, all-ages epic poem and genuine “spell” to treasure (and share) for a lifetime. Rowan Blaize launches the series, while the following works bring our warlock’s world to luminous life within the framework of several (witch)crafty novels! Click here for all of the special $0.99 Kindle e-book downloads. … Read More POP HAZMAT HEADLINE DU JOUR: Rat-Meat Ring Busted in China! posted by JONATHAN KIERAN

Pop HazMat HOF: Lovably Bad Candy from Childhood … Licorice Laces! posted by JONATHAN KIERAN

A sweeping modern fairy-tale is born with the adventures of Rowan Blaize. Book One is the timeless magical cornerstone … the subsequent books lift our warlock’s world into the framework of several spellbinding novels. Click here for all of the special $0.99 Kindle e-book downloads! HAZMAT-RETRO HALL OF LAME (LOVABLY BAD FOOD FROM CHILDHOOD) by JONATHAN KIERAN TODAY’S DUBIOUS HONOREE: SHOESTRING LICORICE! or “LICORICE … Read More Pop HazMat HOF: Lovably Bad Candy from Childhood … Licorice Laces! posted by JONATHAN KIERAN

Pop HazMat Headline du Jour: Snakes On a Plane! Virgin America Flights Now Encourage Mile-High Flirting

HAZMAT HEADLINE DU JOUR: Virgin America Flights Now Encourage Mile-High Flirting posted by JONATHAN KIERAN CULTURAL TOXICITY QUOTIENT: 6.5 (Pretty Par for the Current Course) RUDIMENTARY ANALYSIS: Virgin America’s is implementing a new in-flight “Text and Try to Get a Perfect Stranger Drunk for Purposes of a Quickie!” system on its Los Angeles-to-Las Vegas route. You know, because people really aren’t quite perverted, rude … Read More Pop HazMat Headline du Jour: Snakes On a Plane! Virgin America Flights Now Encourage Mile-High Flirting

HAZMAT HEADLINE DU JOUR: Open House Fabulousness at Galante Vineyards (NOT SO) RUDIMENTARY ANALYSIS: I was invited to the “open house” at the Galante Vineyards Ranch wherein new wine releases were being previewed for the public on Saturday. How do I begin to describe the brilliance of these people, opening their land and their arms to welcome friends and wayward strangers to a glorious … Read More

DON’T BE CRUEL: THE ONLY LINDSAY LOHAN POST YOU WILL EVER SEE ON POP HAZMAT

A rather arrogant goddess wants to skin the face off the most adorable warlock you could ever imagine. YOU can save him for only $0.99. Click HERE. AT ISSUE: Lindsay Lohan and the Repulsive Ghoulishness of American Society CASE IN POINT: Actress, universal laughing-stock and young woman Lindsay Lohan took to the David Letterman set the other night and more than held her own … Read More DON’T BE CRUEL: THE ONLY LINDSAY LOHAN POST YOU WILL EVER SEE ON POP HAZMAT

Pop HazMat RANT: We Interrupt Our Regularly Scheduled Programming. Hell yeah. With some John Lennon Thrown-In.

POP HAZMAT IRREGULARITY A rather arrogant goddess wants to skin the face off the most adorable warlock you could ever imagine. YOU can save him for only $0.99. Click HERE. AT ISSUE: Margaret Thatcher’s DEATH REASON FOR RANT: Filthy disgusting inhumanity that — wait for it — is all-too-human. RANT: I’m tired of it. I’m shaking because I am so freaking tired of it. … Read More Pop HazMat RANT: We Interrupt Our Regularly Scheduled Programming. Hell yeah. With some John Lennon Thrown-In.

POP HAZMAT HOF (ONE-HIT WONDER EDITION) “How Bizarre” by OMC

HAZMAT-RETRO HALL OF FAME: ONE HIT WONDER EDITION by JONATHAN KIERAN (A warlock with troll-skin boots? Yeah. Amazon. Click to SET HIM FREE for $0.99) TODAY’S HONOREE: “How Bizarre” by OMC RUDIMENTARY ANALYSIS: The brainchild of New Zealand pop-funk group OMC (Otara Millionaire’s Club), this song could not be escaped by anyone alive and near a radio in the USA in 1997. That’s not … Read More POP HAZMAT HOF (ONE-HIT WONDER EDITION) “How Bizarre” by OMC