Author: Jonathan Kieran
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Did Aphrodite Ride Into Alexandria on a Clam Shell?
Doubtful. But as many know, the ancient Egyptians were conquered and ruled by a line of tempestuous Greek monarchs appointed by Alexander the Great in the first few centuries BCE and Hellenic culture came to exert a mighty influence over…
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Greatest of Great White Sharks—Separating Fish Tales from Science
BEHOLD THIS LINK to a superb website regarding the very largest confirmed, semi-confirmed, and speculated Great White Shark specimens ever caught or encountered. There remains to this day, despite the immediacy of myriad technological documentary methods, much misinformation about the…
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Oh Yeah? Well, YOUR Mama Is a Japanese Bathhouse Witch!
Your Estimable Host presents CAMPY CARTOON VILLAIN-OF-THE-WEEK by JONATHAN KIERAN TODAY’S HONOREE: “Yubaba” (from Hayao Miyazaki’s Spirited Away, 2001 Studio Ghibli) RUDIMENTARY ANALYSIS: “Yubaba” is the name-stealing, scene-stealing, chain-smoking witch who oversees a bathhouse for Japanese spirits and other magical entities in Hayao Miyazaki’s classic animated feature Spirited Away. Yubaba…
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Fairy Tales Can STILL Be Relevant Today!
” …and then Goldilocks successfully sued the bears to the point of abject poverty because they had failed to put a warning label on the bowl of hot porridge before she burglarized their home. THE END!” ——— [Jonathan is busy…
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Random Aughts Movie Review: The Wretchedness of HANSEL and GRETEL: Witch Hunters
Look, this film is not going to get a truly in-depth review because it is as shallow as a freakin’ backyard plastic kiddie pool and doesn’t merit keen analysis, but I do have a few pointed remarks I would like…
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They Heard About It From Farallon Island Sharks
THIS specific behavior among shark populations when invaded by marauding pods of killer whales is certainly interesting but far from unprecedented. It has been observed and documented among Great White Shark populations around the Farallon Islands, seventeen miles west of…
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It Hard to Find a More Dangerous Arachnid
The Phoneutria species of South American spiders are large, Ctenid wandering hunters who prowl the forest floors and trees for all sorts of prey: roaches; lizards; birds; frogs; small snakes; etc. They have long been known to harbor, milligram for…
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Newest Promo-Track from the Upcoming Jessi Colter Album
A touch of contemporary outlaw razzle-dazzle is added to an obscure Colter offering from the 1980s, produced by Margo Price, engineered and mixed by Shooter Jennings. This entire album project (Edge of Forever, Appalachia Record Co.) drops October 27, is…
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WHULL, WHO Would Have Guessed?
Russell Crowe ASCENT captured in all its hoary glory. Really, why are any of us striving if THIS is what you might end-up with? [Jonathan is busy writing and illustrating and finishing a whole slew of projects in preparation for…
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The USA Is Mentally Ill and Needs a Transorbital Lobotomy
Case and point: A MOTHER who looks (strictly in terms of casual observation, solely and allegedly, possibly, and only perhaps) like a crack-headed dipshit cunt from the Ninth Cesspit from Hell leaves her toddler unattended in a hot car for…
Jonathan Kieran 