AUTHOR, ILLUSTRATOR, EXISTENTIAL, INTERROGATOR

And This is the Reason Christians of the East Don’t Employ Statues

First of all, THIS WAS NOT JESUS taking an embarrassing tumble and breaking numerous facial features and limbs. This was a shitty plastic or composite-formed work of asinine art created to supposedly represent Jesus, being trundled around by an assortment of clumsy-asses. Catholics sure do love toting around their graven images. As a “Catholic On the Brink,” I can say that (I could even say that if I were not), but most of the religious art used in Catholic Churches today is deplorably tacky and while I welcome its use for pedagogical purposes, hauling statues around on pedestals for the fainting-couch thrills of gullible old ladies has never gained my appreciation. It’s all a bit too close to ancient and extra super-duperstitious idol worship for my taste.

Why not create better, more uplifting forms of immovable Christian art in churches, works intended to instruct and serve as focuses of meditation and contemplation, rather than adoration, burning candle votive offerings, and kneel-down prayer-sessions? I really need to convert to Orthodoxy. They go bananas over their icons but at least icons serve a distinct inspirational experience and, being two-dimensional, can never be mistaken as toppling deities by the uneducated.

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[ Delightful new work by Jonathan Kieran is slated for major release in 2024 so brace yourselves and think of England. This stuff is built for speed. Stay tuned for more … ]

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