Jonathan Kieran

… AND IF IT DID—Lock the parents up for allowing this album cover to be photographed. Clowns have always been creepy and unfunny and so shall they always remain. Little Timmy up there may have escaped with his life but I’ll bet he didn’t escape without a bad case of scabies, a nose full of whiskey-breath, and a lifetime of nightmares. (Seriously, the adults who green-lit this shot should have been lobotomized.) My votes for the likely name of the clown:

CAPTAIN BEDRAGGLES

IMPETIGO ERNIE

RANDY RINGWORM

SKEEVESTICKER

DIDDLY-DUKE

UNCLE FLOPSWEAT

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[ THE WEDNESDAY BOX, a dark fable by Jonathan Kieran is slated for international release May 19, 2026 ]

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