Category: Uncategorized
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Pop HazMat Alert: American Birds Migrating (For Their Very Lives) to North Korea?
HAZMAT HEADLINE DU JOUR: North Korean Film Claims Americans Eat Snow, Live in Tents, Shoot Children CULTURAL TOXICITY QUOTIENT:6.5 = Significant, particularly if North Koreans derived this intelligence from Dennis Rodman (see photo above). RUDIMENTARY ANALYSIS: North Korea, a nation…
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Pop HazMat Alert: Don’t “Pet the Dolphin”!
HAZMAT HEADLINE DU JOUR: 3 Killer Commando Dolphins from Ukraine on the Loose CULTURAL TOXICITY QUOTIENT: 2 & 1/2. Negligible, particularly if killer dolphins are armed with mines and speeding toward infamous Carnival Cruise ship, Triumph, AKA “Fabled Floating City…
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Pop HazMat Alert: A Foreshock for Something Larger
HAZMAT HEADLINE DU JOUR: “So-Cal Quake Could be Foreshock for Something Larger” CULTURAL TOXICITY QUOTIENT: 1.5 (Negligible: 8 out of 10 scientists surveyed now believe cataclysms are “restorative experiences”.) RUDIMENTARY ANALYSIS: The “Big One” is imminent, at least in the…
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Let’s Just Add to the Stress-Heap, Shall We? GRAPHIC NOVEL IN-THE-WORKS
As if I wasn’t grumpy enough due to concerns about the upcoming book-trailer and audiobook adaptations of my Rowan Blaize series (recently launched by the lovely Brightbourne folk), to say nothing of the fourth installment arriving in October, but the…
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Nobody’s Byzness but the Turks’ : Norwich Proves Human History Looks Ghastlier When Condensed
Oh, the humanity! Oh, the inhumanity! Oh, the beheadings, pillagings, assassinations, blindings, intrigues, tonsurings, tongue-splittings, nose-slicings, banishments, castrations, buggerings, fornications, tonsurings, infanticides, icon-smashings, and war, war, war, war, WAR. And you get all of that even before the First Crusade…
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Dunkin’ Donuts So Freakin’ Stale that Customer Needs Axe to Chop Through Glaze
My dear grandfather (God rest his soul) loved nothing more than being surrounded by buxom-if-blowsy waitresses with names like “Lurlene” and “Brenda-Bob” in that creme-filled cholesterol-boosting wonderland known as Dunkin’ Donuts. During visits to my grandparents’ Florida retirement home, I…
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American Cunning … Up at the Sharp End
A waitress at an Appleby’s in Colorado walks up to take an order at a table of young women who’ve got their drinkin’-dresses on for an evening of FUN! The waitress, Brianna Priddy (a name you literally want to pet),…
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The Lavender Farm that Rowan Blaize Built? Yes … THAT Would be Fine
I’m not an author/artist of terribly brazen ambitions, at least not in terms of the entire “Fame-game, ho-stroll, dumb-it-down & sell your soul” paradigm. No. No no no no NO. I would like my work, my efforts, to be recognized…
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I Should Have Been Working On Storyboards But Ridley Scott SAVED Me, Hallelujah!
This was the day I had earmarked to flesh-out (actually, to create … heh heh) the storyboards for the upcoming high-budget book trailers we are slated to do for the Rowan Blaize series. What a laugh. The only “earmark” I…
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Have a Little ABSINTHE to Stave-Off the Cultural Malaise …
Of course, I could be referring to the bewildering beverage of Yore in all its wormwood-infused notoriety. Absinthe (or updated, watered-down versions of the drink) has indeed been making a considerable comeback in Europe and North America over the past…
Jonathan Kieran 