Jonathan Kieran

Not that I was in any way stunned or surprised, but the big-budget Russell Crowe-helmed horror flick, The Pope’s Exorcist, turned out to be one of the five or six worst specimens of cinematic deuce-pinching imaginable. The story was asinine. The plot was garbage. The acting was abhorrent. The pacing was abominable. The sets were abysmal. The “demonic” villain was about as scary and as stupid as a googly-eyed sock puppet. Need I go on?

No.

Why did I watch it? I figured Russell Crowe would have the good sense to sign-up for a project that boasted—at the very least—a sensible, linear script. Fat chance (no pun intended, Russell).

I fell asleep with the ear buds in place 3/4 of the way through this fetid barrel of sun-baked fish guts.

That does it. In the future I’m not watching films made beyond 2004. I’ve tried to deny it, but either the hoi polloi have genuinely been dumbed-down to the point of catatonia or Hollywood is really the collective victim of possession by demons—demons of stultification.

It’s probably a case of both.

[Look for Jonathan Kieran’s fabulous new—as yet untitled—book of hundreds of witty, cynical, zeitgeist-rocking, and knee-slappingly clever cartoons of Pure Smartassery in 2024! Stay tuned for developing news and previews.]

———

#ThePopesExorcist #RussellCrowe #SteamingBarrelsOfOffal #MoviesSuckToday #AuthorJonathanKieran #JonathanKieran #WriterJonathanKieran #CaliforniaLife #OnTheEdge #Wistwood #JonathanKieranTheAuthor #JonathanKieranMusic #JonathanKieranNewAlbum #JonathanKieranArtist #Jericho #JonathanKieranJericho #JerichoAlbum #WritersOfInstagram