It could be worse. I hear Aquaman is selling #timeshares.

EAVESDROPPING at the OUTSKIRTS of EXCESS: POP HAZMAT presents “CAPTURED MOMENTS” by JONATHAN KIERAN

"So a desperate little paparazzo finally gets a shot of me, after all these years. Big freakin' deal! You think this is gonna ruin my morning? Ha! Sure, things started going downhill after the series got cancelled in 1978. Have you ever had the bank repossess your invisible plane?  No? Well, it ain't no day at the beach, let me tell you, pal. I've made some mistakes since then. Who hasn't? Sure, I started hanging around with Kirstie Alley and  sublimating my fragile emotions primarily through the wanton and ravenous consumption of baked goods. It happens to a lot of people. Just ask Val Kilmer. But I can still work the hell out of this Golden Lasso, honey, so if I were you, I'd make tracks and let a lady walk into her local Coldstone Creamery without the need for bloodshed. Capiche?"

“So a desperate little paparazzo finally gets a shot of me, after all these years. Big freakin’ deal! You think this is gonna ruin my morning? Think again, asshole. Sure, things went downhill after the series got cancelled in 1978. Have you ever had the bank repossess your invisible plane? No? Well, it ain’t no day at the beach, let me tell you, pal. I’ve made some mistakes since then. Who hasn’t? I started hanging-out a little too much with Kirstie Alley and sublimating my fragile emotions through the ravenous consumption of baked goods. So what? It happens to a lot of people. Just ask Val Kilmer. But I can still work the hell out of this Golden Lasso, honey, so if I were you, I’d make tracks and let a lady walk into Coldstone Creamery without the need for bloodshed. Capiche?”


______________________

If you’re bored and don’t have any Japanese eyeballs to lick, hop on over to Jonathan Kieran’s Official Facebook Page and give it a Like!

Escape the Imminent Collapse of Civilization, Friends, if only for a few hours. A sweeping modern fairy-tale is born with the Rowan Blaize series of books. Click on the book covers to the right or have a look below …

Watch the Rowan Blaize Book Trailer HERE.

Book One = The magical cornerstone – a lavishly illustrated epic narrative poem … a genuine “spell” for the young and young-at-heart to treasure for a lifetime, telling the story of sorcerer Rowan Blaize’s battle to regain his magic powers. (Think Beowulf-meets-Dr.Seuss or an epic story-in-verse of a scope similar to Tolkien’s soon-to-be-released The Fall of Arthur, only contemporary.)

Book Two = The rip-roaring novel that continues the adventures of Rowan Blaize and introduces the three hilarious witches of the Ancient City, along with its dysfunctional werewolves, wraiths, ghosts, vampires, dryads, banshees and a beauty pageant brat that just might destroy the world.

Book Three = The next novel that finds Rowan trapped by a spell in another world, caught between a faery-squashing sorceress who’ll stop at nothing to conquer the kingdom … and a feisty teenage prince who’s determined to get it back.

Click here to purchase the Kindle e-books and watch a video of Jonathan discussing his work.
__________________________________________
Barnes and Noble
IndieBound
Books-A-Million
Rowan Blaize Official Website
Goodreads

1 Comment on “It could be worse. I hear Aquaman is selling #timeshares.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: