Category: Lowest Common Denominator

4.29.2014 6:05 PM

I was still willing to give cinema the benefit of the doubt. Then I saw Hansel & Gretel: Witch Hunters #despair

Look, this film is not going to get an in-depth review because it doesn’t merit one, but I do have a few pointed remarks I would like to share out of what you might call an overriding sense of colossal…
1.10.2014 1:14 AM

Because we all know #anyone can do it. #trueartistry

_________ Jonathan Kieran’s (as-yet-untitled) new novel is slated for release in late Spring 2014. Look for news about the release here and at Amazon.com in the coming weeks and months. Jonathan is also the author of the classically appointed Rowan…
12.24.2013 12:44 AM

Nurse Peggy: not impressed by fancy accents. #BritishLife

* * * ________ Jonathan Kieran’s (as-yet-untitled) new novel is slated for release in late Spring 2014. Look for news about the release here and at Amazon.com in the coming weeks and months. Jonathan is also the author of the…
12.9.2013 11:43 PM

Don’t let the crocodile tears fool you. Little Karen plotted Frosty’s demise. #holidaycheer

I confess to undergoing a somewhat disturbing phase in my youth–one in which I imagined utterly cheerless “alternative plots” and dark, warped endings to various beloved Christmas cartoons (particularly ones featuring cherubic little girls who were really snow-murderesses in disguise).…
9.30.2013 6:58 PM

Hate when the Mormon lady critiques my selections at the movie-rental counter! #awkward

I can only imagine what the DVD/Video purveyor thinks of me when I barge into our tiny, local Mom & Pop shop on occasion and, after half an hour of milling-around and scrutinizing titles, end-up selecting a heap of the…
7.3.2013 5:59 PM

Gentlemen, Start Your … er … fill your glasses. #holidaybooze

For the lovely lovely darling souls who actually follow the HazMat I do indeed want to note a couple of things: 1. I am deep in the entrails of completing a new novel, so this is why I am whittling…
6.19.2013 5:26 PM

Don’t worry, fellow #doglovers: Doris Day & Betty White have been alerted and they are ON IT!

POP HAZMAT HEADLINE DU JOUR: Activists Target Dog-Meat Festival in China by JONATHAN KIERAN CULTURAL TOXICITY QUOTIENT: 10 (Can’t the Chinese just go back to eating rodents, like normal people? Can’t they lick each other’s eyeballs and call it a…
5.25.2013 5:20 PM

Pop HazMat Headline du Jour: Ashton Kutcher Says Twitter is Really Messed Up

GOODREADS MEMBERS Click Here for a Chance to Win a Giveaway Copy of Rowan Blaize and the Hand of Djin Rummy by Jonathan Kieran. The Contest runs until June 10! Watch the Rowan Blaize Book Trailer HERE. _______________________ HAZMAT HEADLINE…
5.20.2013 7:41 PM

POP HAZMAT HEADLINE du JOUR: “TAN MOM” Releases Music Video. Asteroid Approaches Earth in Nick of Time.

GOODREADS MEMBERS Click Here for a Chance to Win a Giveaway Copy of Rowan Blaize and the Hand of Djin Rummy by Jonathan Kieran. The Contest runs until June 10! Watch the Rowan Blaize Book Trailer HERE. ______________________________ HAZMAT HEADLINE…