Author: Jonathan Kieran
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Pop HazMat Alert: Don’t “Pet the Dolphin”!
HAZMAT HEADLINE DU JOUR: 3 Killer Commando Dolphins from Ukraine on the Loose CULTURAL TOXICITY QUOTIENT: 2 & 1/2. Negligible, particularly if killer dolphins are armed with mines and speeding toward infamous Carnival Cruise ship, Triumph, AKA “Fabled Floating City…
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Pop HazMat Alert: A Foreshock for Something Larger
HAZMAT HEADLINE DU JOUR: “So-Cal Quake Could be Foreshock for Something Larger” CULTURAL TOXICITY QUOTIENT: 1.5 (Negligible: 8 out of 10 scientists surveyed now believe cataclysms are “restorative experiences”.) RUDIMENTARY ANALYSIS: The “Big One” is imminent, at least in the…
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Let’s Just Add to the Stress-Heap, Shall We? GRAPHIC NOVEL IN-THE-WORKS
As if I wasn’t grumpy enough due to concerns about the upcoming book-trailer and audiobook adaptations of my Rowan Blaize series (recently launched by the lovely Brightbourne folk), to say nothing of the fourth installment arriving in October, but the…
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Nobody’s Byzness but the Turks’ : Norwich Proves Human History Looks Ghastlier When Condensed
Oh, the humanity! Oh, the inhumanity! Oh, the beheadings, pillagings, assassinations, blindings, intrigues, tonsurings, tongue-splittings, nose-slicings, banishments, castrations, buggerings, fornications, tonsurings, infanticides, icon-smashings, and war, war, war, war, WAR. And you get all of that even before the First Crusade…
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Dunkin’ Donuts So Freakin’ Stale that Customer Needs Axe to Chop Through Glaze
My dear grandfather (God rest his soul) loved nothing more than being surrounded by buxom-if-blowsy waitresses with names like “Lurlene” and “Brenda-Bob” in that creme-filled cholesterol-boosting wonderland known as Dunkin’ Donuts. During visits to my grandparents’ Florida retirement home, I…
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American Cunning … Up at the Sharp End
A waitress at an Appleby’s in Colorado walks up to take an order at a table of young women who’ve got their drinkin’-dresses on for an evening of FUN! The waitress, Brianna Priddy (a name you literally want to pet),…
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The Lavender Farm that Rowan Blaize Built? Yes … THAT Would be Fine
I’m not an author/artist of terribly brazen ambitions, at least not in terms of the entire “Fame-game, ho-stroll, dumb-it-down & sell your soul” paradigm. No. No no no no NO. I would like my work, my efforts, to be recognized…
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I Should Have Been Working On Storyboards But Ridley Scott SAVED Me, Hallelujah!
This was the day I had earmarked to flesh-out (actually, to create … heh heh) the storyboards for the upcoming high-budget book trailers we are slated to do for the Rowan Blaize series. What a laugh. The only “earmark” I…
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Have a Little ABSINTHE to Stave-Off the Cultural Malaise …
Of course, I could be referring to the bewildering beverage of Yore in all its wormwood-infused notoriety. Absinthe (or updated, watered-down versions of the drink) has indeed been making a considerable comeback in Europe and North America over the past…
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Not the City-Boy I Once Was (Or Thought I Was)
Three days in San Francisco were slightly jolting, given that my life (for better or for worse) has become increasingly reclusive in the past few years. All was well because it ended well, but I am mad with joy to…
Jonathan Kieran 